Module 12: HR Leadership Training

One-on-One Question Bank

Thirty-six ready-to-use questions for the one-on-ones you actually run. Care questions, goal questions, coaching questions, the questions that surface what is really going on, and the closing questions that hold the educator to one priority before next time.

How to use this bank

Module 5 makes the case plainly: leaders who run regular one-on-ones have 33% lower voluntary turnover and noticeably stronger team performance. The reason most leaders do not run them well is not that they do not believe in them. It is that the meeting drifts into operational catch-up because the leader does not know what else to ask.

This bank gives you the questions. Six phases follow the structure recommended in the Leadership Fundamentals Guide: open with care, review goals, surface roadblocks, coach into a stretch or a stuck point, share what they need to know, and close with one priority. Pick three or four questions per one-on-one. Do not run all thirty-six. The point is to ask the right question for the moment, not to interrogate the educator.

01 Care first, coach second Always open with how the educator is going as a person before you talk about the work. If you skip this, the rest of the conversation runs cold.
02 Ask, then wait Most of these questions need silence afterwards. Count to seven in your head before you fill the gap. The real answer is usually the second sentence the educator says, not the first.
03 Question, not advice Every coaching question on this list is designed to help the educator think it through, not to set you up to give the answer. Beat the Advice Monster.
04 One priority before you finish Every one-on-one closes with the educator naming the one thing they are committing to before the next meeting. If you skip this, nothing changes between sessions.
Care Goals and progress Roadblocks Coaching Development and growth Closing
01
Care: How The Educator Is Going
Always open here

The first ten minutes of the meeting belong to the person, not the role. These questions check in on how the educator is going as a human being before you ask them about practice, goals or anything operational. If you skip this section the educator reads the whole meeting as a performance review they were not warned about.

Care Open every one-on-one with this
How are you going? Properly. Not the work answer.
When to use it

Every single one-on-one. The two-word version of "how are you" gets the social answer. Adding "properly, not the work answer" gives the educator permission to tell you something real.

Listening for

Energy levels, sleep, family pressure, anything happening at home that is going to affect what they bring into the room. You are not solving any of it. You are noticing it.

Follow-upIf they say "Yeah, fine" and that is clearly not the whole story, try: "What does fine mean this week?"
Care When you suspect they are running on empty
On a scale of one to ten, how is your energy this week?
When to use it

When the educator looks tired, when the room is short-staffed, when you have noticed slips in things that normally come naturally to them. Asking for a number cuts through the politeness.

Listening for

The number itself, but more importantly the gap between the number and what they look like. A five out of ten that comes with a long pause is a four. Ask what would move it up by one.

Follow-up"What would have to be different next week to make that a six?"
Care Once a quarter
What is the best part of your week and what is the hardest?
When to use it

Quarterly check-in question. Forces the educator to name both the high and the low, so you do not get the all-positive or all-negative version.

Listening for

The hard one is the one to follow. If the same hard thing comes up two quarters in a row that is a pattern, not a one-off bad week.

Follow-up"What would help with the hardest part? What is in my control to change?"
Care When you sense disengagement
When was the last time you finished a shift and felt good about the day?
When to use it

If the educator has gone quiet, if they are doing the work but the spark is gone, or if you cannot tell whether they are coasting or struggling. This question often gets a long pause.

Listening for

How long ago. If they have to think for more than a few seconds the answer is "too long ago" and you have a wellbeing or fit conversation to have, not a performance one.

Follow-up"What was different about that day? What was happening in the room?"
Care When wellbeing is the focus
Is there anything outside work I should know about that might affect how this period goes for you?
When to use it

When you can tell something has shifted but the educator has not raised it. Frames disclosure as optional and protective, not as an interrogation. Use the educator's name when you ask.

Listening for

What they choose to share, and what they consciously do not. If they tell you, your job is to hold it confidentially, adjust what you can, and remind them of the EAP if you have one.

Follow-up"You do not have to tell me details. What I need to know is what would help over the next few weeks."
Care First one-on-one with a new educator
What is the best way to give you feedback so it actually lands?
When to use it

First one-on-one. Sets the expectation that feedback is going to happen, and lets the educator tell you whether they want it in the moment, in a one-on-one, or written first to think about. Module 5 names this as a deliberate ask.

Listening for

Their answer is their answer. Honour it. If they say "send me an email first then we talk" that becomes how you do it. Re-ask every six months because preferences change.

Follow-up"What about positive feedback? Same way, or different?"
02
Goals And Progress
Every meeting, second block

After care comes the work. These questions review where the educator is up to against the goals you set together. The point is not to audit them, it is to surface what they are noticing about their own progress so you can support, redirect, or celebrate. If they have not used the Goal Setting Generator yet, this is the moment to add it.

Goals Every meeting
How are you tracking against the goals we set last time?
When to use it

Standard opening to the goals block. Module 5 expects the educator to have updated their notes on this before the meeting, so you can spend time on the why, not the what.

Listening for

Whether they actually know. If the answer is fuzzy, the goal was either not specific enough or has not been reviewed since you set it. Either way, that is the next conversation.

Follow-up"Walk me through what you have been working on for that goal in the last fortnight."
Goals Mid-period check
What is getting in the way of you achieving this goal?
When to use it

Module 5 calls this question out specifically. Asking what is in the way before the goal slips lets you remove the blocker now, instead of finding out at the end of the period that it never moved.

Listening for

Three categories of blocker: a skills gap (training fixes it), a workload or system issue (you fix it), or a motivation issue (a different conversation). Naming which one helps you both.

Follow-up"Of those three, which one is the biggest? And what is in my control to help with?"
Goals When a goal slipped
If you knew last month what you know now, would you set this goal the same way?
When to use it

When a goal has not moved and you are not sure whether to push or to revise. This question lets the educator tell you whether the goal is still right, without making it sound like they are giving up.

Listening for

"No, I would set it differently" is a green light to revise the goal together. "Yes" means the goal is still right and the conversation is about what is blocking delivery.

Follow-up"What would the better version of this goal look like? Same outcome, different shape?"
Goals When a goal is going well
What is working that you want to keep doing?
When to use it

Most leaders only ask "what is not working". This question makes the educator name what is working so they can do more of it, and so you can recognise the practice on the spot.

Listening for

Specific practices, not generic answers. "I am being more patient" is generic. "I am giving the toddlers a five-minute warning before transitions and pre-empting the meltdown" is specific. Push for specific.

Follow-up"Where else in the room could you use that same approach?"
Goals When the program is changing
What is one thing you have noticed about the children this period that is shaping how you plan?
When to use it

Anchors the goals conversation back to the children, which is the only reason the goals exist. Useful with educators who slip into talking about adult dynamics in the room without referencing the practice impact.

Listening for

Whether the educator is still observing the children or whether they have stopped noticing. The quality of the noticing tells you a lot about where they are in their practice right now.

Follow-up"How is that showing up in the planning cycle for next week?"
03
Roadblocks And Support
Before the conversation closes

If you only ask the educator how they are tracking and never ask what is in the way, you are running a status report meeting, not a one-on-one. This block surfaces the things they would not bring up themselves. Most service-level problems get fixed faster when they get named in a one-on-one than when they get raised in a team meeting.

Roadblock Every meeting
What is one thing in the service right now that is making your job harder than it should be?
When to use it

Standard friction-finder. Asking specifically about "the service" not "the room" lets the educator point at process, rostering, communication or supplies, not just team dynamics.

Listening for

Patterns across one-on-ones. If three educators name the same thing in the same fortnight, that is a service-level item for the next leadership meeting, not three individual fixes.

Follow-up"What would the small fix look like? And what would the proper fix look like?"
Roadblock When the room is busy
What is taking your time at the moment that should not be?
When to use it

Workload and time-use review. Get this in regularly so you spot the educator who has gradually absorbed admin or coordination work that should sit somewhere else.

Listening for

Tasks they have inherited by accident, jobs they keep doing because no one else will, or admin that has crept in. Often they have not noticed the drift themselves until you ask.

Follow-up"If we took that off you, who would actually own it instead?"
Roadblock When team dynamics are unclear
Who in the team are you finding it easy to work with right now? Who is trickier?
When to use it

When you sense team friction but no one is naming it, or when you are about to make a roster change and want to know what the educator is actually navigating. Frame it as a working preference question, not a complaint invitation.

Listening for

Whether the "trickier" person is the same one you are hearing about from other educators. If yes, that is a feedback conversation for that other educator, not a venting session for this one.

Follow-up"What would make the trickier one easier? Is there something I should be doing?"
Roadblock When you suspect they are stuck
Is there a decision you are waiting on me for?
When to use it

Direct question that surfaces the things the educator has on hold because they need a yes or no from you. Most leaders are surprised by the answer.

Listening for

Anything they have been waiting on for more than a week. Make the call in the meeting if you can, or commit to a date by which you will. Do not finish the meeting with the decision still hanging.

Follow-up"Anything you have been holding back from raising because it felt small?"
Roadblock When something has gone wrong
What does the support look like that would actually help you here?
When to use it

After an incident, a hard family conversation, a notifiable matter, or any moment where the educator is rattled. Lets them tell you what they need, instead of you guessing and offering the wrong thing.

Listening for

What they ask for. It is often smaller than you expect. "An hour off the floor on Friday to do my documentation" is more useful than "lots of support". Honour what they asked for if you can.

Follow-up"What would I be doing in three weeks that would tell you I had really backed you on this?"
04
Coaching Questions
Around the ten-minute coaching block

Module 5 reserves about ten minutes of every one-on-one for coaching. The trap is jumping in with the answer when the educator brings you a problem. The questions in this phase keep you in coaching mode and beat the Advice Monster. Use one or two per meeting, not the whole list.

Coaching Open every coaching block here
What is on your mind?
When to use it

The opening question from Michael Bungay Stanier's coaching framework. Wide enough to let the educator name what they actually want to talk about, narrow enough that they will not just say "everything".

Listening for

The first thing they say is rarely the real thing. Note it, then ask the next question to push past the surface answer.

Follow-up"And what else is on your mind?" Ask three times before you move on. The third answer is often the real one.
Coaching When they bring you a problem
What is the real challenge here for you?
When to use it

Bungay Stanier's "focus question". Forces the educator to move from describing the situation to naming the part of it they actually need to work on. Saves you from coaching the wrong problem.

Listening for

The shift from external ("the toddler will not transition") to internal ("I am running out of patience by 2pm and I do not know what to do"). The internal version is the one to coach.

Follow-up"And what is the real challenge here for you?" Asking it twice with the emphasis on "you" gets past the diagnosis answer.
Coaching Before you offer your view
What have you already thought about doing?
When to use it

Before you give advice. Almost every educator who brings you a problem has already had one or two ideas. Asking this surfaces them and stops you reinventing what they already came up with.

Listening for

Whether they have a clear option that just needs your encouragement, or whether they genuinely have not thought it through. Different responses for each.

Follow-up"What is one more option you have not considered yet?"
Coaching When they want you to make the decision
If you had to make this call yourself, what would you do?
When to use it

When the educator is leaning on you to decide something they could decide themselves. Builds confidence and stops you becoming the bottleneck for every room-level call.

Listening for

If their answer is the same as yours, back them. If it is not, ask what they would weigh up. Most of the time they get to the right call when given the chance.

Follow-up"What is stopping you from just doing that?"
Coaching When you are the one stuck
If we made progress on this in the next two weeks, what would be different?
When to use it

When the conversation has been going round in circles. Pulls the educator forward into "what would success look like" so you can both spot the smaller next step.

Listening for

The smallest possible difference they can name. That is the next step. Most leaders skip past this question to "what are you going to do" too early.

Follow-up"And what would the children notice was different?"
Coaching After they have decided what to do
What might get in the way of you actually doing that?
When to use it

The pre-mortem question. Once the educator has named the action, ask this before they leave the meeting. Surfaces the predictable barriers before they hit them.

Listening for

Specific things, not general worries. "I always say I will do that and then it is Friday" is useful. "I am just so busy" is not. Push for the specific.

Follow-up"What would help you make sure that does not happen this time?"
05
Development And Growth
Once a month minimum

Module 5 names regular development conversations as one of the strongest drivers of retention. Educators who feel like they are growing are far less likely to leave. These questions surface where they want to grow, what is in their way, and what the next horizon looks like. Pair with the Development Goals Builder and the Development Plan Generator.

Growth Monthly minimum
What are you focusing on for your development before our next check-in?
When to use it

Module 5 names this question explicitly. The development goal does not have to be big. "Improving how I document observations" or "leading group time on Wednesdays" is enough.

Listening for

Whether they have one. If they cannot name a development focus, that is the conversation: pick one together. Educators who are growing in a specific direction stay engaged.

Follow-up"What is the smallest version of that I would actually see in the room next week?"
Growth When they are ready to stretch
What is something in your role you would like to be doing in six months that you are not doing yet?
When to use it

For educators who are settled and ready for more. Lets them name the stretch without putting pressure on them to commit to it on the spot.

Listening for

Concrete things you can build a plan around. "Leading the practice meeting once a term", "mentoring a Cert III student", "running parent meetings". Match these against opportunities you can offer.

Follow-up"What is one piece of that I could give you next month to test the water?"
Growth Once a quarter
What part of the work feels easiest at the moment? What part feels hardest?
When to use it

Quarterly question. The "easiest" answer is often the educator's strength they have not named yet. The "hardest" is the development area for the next period.

Listening for

Whether the easiest thing is something you could give them more of. Whether the hardest thing is something you could train, coach or restructure away.

Follow-up"What would it look like to spend more of your week on the easiest part?"
Growth When the educator is leadership material
If you stayed at this service for another five years, what would you want your role to look like?
When to use it

Career horizon question. Lets the educator name a longer arc without forcing a "do you want to be a Service Manager" yes-or-no answer. Often surfaces aspirations they have not said out loud.

Listening for

Direction more than detail. Room Leader, Educational Leader, ECT-qualified, mentoring, off-floor work, no change at all. All valid. Match the answer to the development plan.

Follow-up"What would have to happen in the next twelve months to put you on that path?"
Growth Educator returning from leave
What is one thing you want to be different about how you work this time around?
When to use it

First or second one-on-one after a return from parental leave, extended sick leave or a long break. Gives the educator permission to name what they want to change without it sounding like a complaint about before.

Listening for

Hours, days, the type of work, the boundaries they want to hold. Often it is something you can accommodate if you know about it now. Document the conversation in writing.

Follow-up"What would tell you in three months that this was working?"
Growth Once a year
What is one piece of feedback you would give me about how I lead this team?
When to use it

Annually, with educators who you have a good working relationship with. Models the feedback culture from the top. Expect the first answer to be polite. Push for the real one.

Listening for

What you do not want to hear. Receive it without defending. "Thank you for telling me that" is the only acceptable first response.

Follow-up"What would I be doing differently in three months that would tell you I had heard this?"
06
Closing And Accountability
Last five minutes

Module 5 names this as the final question of every one-on-one. Without it nothing changes between meetings, the educator drifts, and you have a status update conversation in three weeks instead of a progress conversation. The closing block is short, deliberate, and always written down.

Closing Every meeting, no exceptions
What is the number one priority you are committing to deliver between now and our next check-in?
When to use it

The closing question Module 5 names by name. Forces the educator to pick one thing, not five. Drives accountability in the next meeting because you can both see clearly whether it happened.

Listening for

One thing. If they name three, ask which one is the actual priority. If they cannot pick, you pick together. Write it down in the meeting and confirm it in the follow-up email.

Follow-up"By when? And what does done look like?"
Closing When they did not deliver last time
Last time you committed to [the priority]. Walk me through what happened with that.
When to use it

When the previous meeting's commitment did not happen. Module 5 calls out the two reasons: it was not actually the priority, or something stopped them. Either way, this is the conversation, not a re-stating of the goal.

Listening for

Honest reasons, not excuses. If it was the wrong priority, say so and reset. If it was a barrier, surface and remove it. If it is a pattern of not following through, that becomes a feedback conversation, not a one-on-one chat.

Follow-up"What is the one thing that has to be different next time so the same thing does not happen?"
Closing Before they leave the meeting
Is there anything else we need to cover before we wrap?
When to use it

The fail-safe. Catches the thing the educator was building up to all meeting and only mentions in the last two minutes. Resist the temptation to skip this if you are running late.

Listening for

The "actually" answer. "Actually, there is one thing." That is usually the most important thing the educator was going to say to you all week.

Follow-up"Is that something we should book in another conversation about, or can we do it now?"
Closing When the meeting was hard
How did this conversation land for you?
When to use it

When you have given hard feedback, when the conversation went somewhere unexpected, or when the educator went quiet. Lets them name how the meeting felt before they leave the room.

Listening for

What they actually say. If they say "fine" and look not-fine, name what you are seeing: "It does not look fine. Is there something we should sit with?"

Follow-up"Is there anything you wish I had said differently? You can tell me now or next time."